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Record of the Lodoss wars:
Of all the animes I've seen, this is prolly the best. The story of a magic elf, an insanely skilled dwarf axe-man, a gay priest with his magic rod (go figure), a berzerker fully equipped with bulging muscles, a red haired angry mercenary chick and PORN (by porn I mean the loveable star of Lodoss wars (by loveable I mean this guy is so stupid and klutzy you wouldn't be surprised if he just shoved his sword right into his head at any moment). The plot of the movie is that in Lodoss, wars have been raging for ages between good and evil. In the final war for Lodoss an angry sorcerer with a horrible hairdo try's to resurrect the demon god kardiss by getting Porn's high elf chick naked and dropping her to the center of the earth (makes sense to me). Anyway, in the course of this crazy movie series, lots of cool stuff happens. For example, Gim, the lovable dwarf, manages to launch his axe at a sorceress's head, knock her crown without touching her, and have the axe boomerang back to him! How's that for mad skills? (He does this in high winds too). Oh I forgot to mention a very important part of the movie. Porn's archival is a black knight named ass-ram who runs around shoving his "demon-sword" into everyone and everything. To sum it all up, Porn, a naked elf, and their priest, a guy named Gay-toe, do battle with ass-ram and a sorcerer who looks like moe from the three stooges. With a great story, fantastic animation, and well-developed characters this is probably the best fantasy anime out there. The only thing it doesn't have is the "super stooge style defense" from Flame of Recca. All in all I give it 10 out 10 garden gnomes doing the horizontal gnome dance.
By Lu
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Brother/Sister/LifePartner Things
 Danny's weekly video game column. Culture, history, gameplay, tech, and dick jokes. Funny, if you're a dorkmo.
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