You're Under Arrest!

Some times, Some crimes. . .

     "You're Under Arrest" is, as far as I see, just a police show. I think it was supposed to be like an old 70's cop show - "Miami Vice" or something. Or "Chip and Dale, Rescue Rangers". God, I loved those guys.
     "You're Under Arrest - The Movie" takes place one year after the end of the series. Kinoshita and Tsujimoto are reunited after their training for one last bang-fest. (I mean guns, man. Geeeez.) Two years ago, someone wrote a plan to storm the police station. It was the perfect plan, unstopable. Even by Colossus, who is now dead. Stop reading and sit a moment in silence. Now go. Anyways, no one knows who has this powerful plan; even the captain is suspected. Eventually, the plan is stolen by the mob(?) and a full on war takes place in the station. Not that there is actually anything worth stealing in a police station. . . All the badges you can eat? Needless to say, the cops win, the captain is freed, and the movie ends. I still have no idea why the criminals wanted this plan. At least a lot of bridges exploded. And, I can't believe I just noticed this, but why are all the officers chicks? And why can the anime chicks punch??

     Now, this show had great potential. It could have been like "Dragnet", full of drugged-out hippies and genius homicidal Hooters girls with explosives for ta-tas. It could have been even better, because this show stars two girls. And girls have sex. Always. Trust me.
     I expected this movie to be the anime version of "Show Girls", or at least "Saved by The Bell". Instead, this movie let me down. Not "Shaving Ryan's Privates", this movie was a midnight ride through Cancer Land. Chemo all the way.
     Admittedly, I am probably exagerating, and I didn't watch the whole thing. Who can go two hours without wanking? Not Pee Wee Herman, for one. But, judging by what I did hear, all of it, I can definitively say, "I'd rather eat a bowl of asshole than ever see this show again." I can even say it in a New York accent. Fo' sho'.

     This movie probably wasn't really as bad as I make it out to be and deserves a decent grade to show it. The animation was decent, but that's about it. Not even a theme song. There was no character development and no thought out plot. But, I guess thats to be expected from a movie that belongs to a larger series. This movie made me want to slap it in the face until it fell over and vomited urine. On the Danny scale, a 5 out of 10.
     Wait, I guess it's okay??


By Danny