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Postal Service Scavenger Hunt!I swear to God, I have no idea where I come up with dumbass ideas like this.Today, talking with Jes, I came up with something. Kind of a USPS scavenger hunt. To be honest, I'm fairly sure that this project is doomed to failure. Failure of epic proportions like the nGage, Dreamcast, and my three years wearing nothing but MC Hammer baggy pants. I can't help myself. The very slight promise of success leads me to believe that this is hilarious. I'm sending four letters through standard US mail. One to my friend Matt, one to Marteney, one to my parents' new house, and one to myself (in my apartment). As a second note, I never actually have recieved a letter in the mail, except from Jes. Anyone willing to remedy this can ask my address, just to make me feel loved. Letter One:  Westlake Island That new house, just finished building The front door looks a little castley Westlake Village, CA 91301  Please deliver. There's a dollar iside you can have when it gets there. See, my original idea involved including a one dollar bill into every letter I sent out, as a prize for the mailman. Of course, Jordan then reminded me that a dollar in the envelope could just lead the mailman to open the envelope and take it. I'm confidant, however, that mail tampering laws protect even letters like this from this. The law is made to be abused and used for things like this. I am fighting for my right to party. Letter Two:  Berkeley, CA 94704 That building on Shattuck Ave It has "Jupiters. You're almost there." on the side. Near two Starbux Unit 406  Deliver this and you can have the dollar inside. Really. What the unfortunate mailman doesn't realize at this point, however, is that I totally ran out of one dollar bills. I have no bank access at the moment, and I have more important things like food to look into. Sustainance. This envelope is filled with one dollar in Berkeley Arcade Tokens. On the off chance that the mail man is an avid DDR fan, I figure we're even. If he likes shooters or fighters, we're even too, but only if he's good enough to stand up to that crowd. Berkeley is hardcore.  Letter Three:  My friend, Matt A house on St. Laurent I used to live there once. I know the mailman Ask him where to go (I also knew the ice cream man) - Fernando  There is $1 inside for you, mail man. Thank you for putting up with me. Again, however, I feel a little bit shady. After enclosing one dollar in tokens, I realized that I too like tokens. And, despite the mailman's hard work, I need them more. My job is more stressful than his. My job is making his job meaningless. With luck, my mail man likes tea or french fries. I instead enclosed one stamp toward a free tea, at my local tea house. You need to get eleven more teas until this card has value. I guess he'll only really get 1/12 of a tea out of this, but I'm counting on a mail man not being good at math. Just Because.  Letter 4: Front: My friend Ryan drives a blue truck. It's hard to miss. [Street Name], CA 91301 Back: If you ask, he'll give you a dollar. I'm all out My camera crapped out before I could get a picture of Ryan's letter. With any luck, he can take a picture instead. Little does Marteney know. I've sent him a precious gift. The gift of debt. For anyone curious, this one picture was left on my camera, from when Ryan and I went to Vegas. The hand sign is the one the ninjas do, in "Big Trouble in Little China". Somehow, it applies. 
By Danny
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Link Back Links Writer(s) |
 Danny's weekly video game column. Culture, history, gameplay, tech, and dick jokes. Funny, if you're a dorkmo. |
Puuba-Danny