Winter Break Flash Extraordinaire
Danny's Boring Break Down

Bejeweled - http://zone.msn.com/bejeweled/
Background: I could never figure out the premise of a game without a plot, so I figured this game must have one; they just forgot. In this game, you play as some kind of hero, trying to save a village full of people who got turned into pretty rocks. To save them, just put three of them next to each other in a row and watch their heads explode. Thus turning them back into their original, bloody, melted human gore forms. Or freeing their souls. . .
Or something.
What? Did My Little Pony turn evil?
Graphics: If I was looking for something that came out of my dad's ass, I guess this is the game for me. If, however, I was looking for a game without nuts, try Sega. If I was looking for fun, try wanking.
Difficulty: On hardest mode, I fell asleep at the keyboard. On medium, my dog fell asleep at the board. On easy, a retard fell asleep in his bed, and drown in a pool of his own feces. All three players "won" the game.
Logic: If I can turn a jewel into thin air, why can't I turn thin air into a jewel?? This game is just depressing. I could be rich. Oh, also, if you say my name backward, I'll spin you a thread made of golden your first born. Or something like that.
nikstlitslpmur. Mxyplx.
Fun: This game has wasted away hours of supposed homework time. This game ate up over half an hour of supposed this article time. With luck, I plan on never actually finishing this article. I myself will become a skeleton zombie computer whiz, with only alien mind powers to operate my computer and fetch my food. Oli will become my power twin, and together, when we say the same magic word, all the word will have peace, and I will turn green. Zanzibar!!

Way of the Stick - http://www.evolver.co.uk/wayofthestick.html
Background: In keeping with the ways of Xiao Xiao, yet another man has determined that good game play makes up for bad graphics. Only this game has neither. In way of the stick, you blow through level after nothing of identical stick enemies. All in some effort to stop the infamous "Pink One". Then, an old Asian man makes fun of you. I don't know what else.
Graphics: Even if the game is supposed to look like total shit, the game more than suceeded. My dog took a shit on my computer today. I kept playing four hours more. Even got a high score. The game didn't even know the difference.
But, at least the guys are different colors. . . Now we know that ninjas aren't racist?
Difficulty: When I stand there holding the kick button, I never ever lose. When I stand in school holding myself, I get sent to the Principal's office. What the hell is that crap? At least in the game, my score doesn't reset.
Logic: Go up to that pillar halfway. Now throw someone. Dead bodies pass through walls. Live ones don't, unless they're looking for you. My answer was going to be that the bodies were maybe ghosts already, but what if the truth is that we all are? Maybe this is just a dream. . .
What then, Casper? What then. . .
Fun: This game ain't half bad. If it had any challenge in it, I would say that it was outright good. As it stands, I've never actually managed to play this game all the way through. Its just way more fun to play with its glitches and see what kind of magic you can make. I made a dinosaur. Can you make a pony??

African Detroit Cop - http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view.php?id=21005
Background: I'm not really sure what this game is about, but Newgrounds tells me its the best. And better people are never wrong. You're supposed to hit people with your taxi. Why do I need a special game to do this?
Graphics: Eddie Murphy in a kafia. 'Nuf said?    If not, Testicles.   Nuf' said.
Difficulty: If you frequently get your penis caught in fans while blowdrying your hair and are currently unable to click a mouse because your hand is a salmon, this game may be a challenge for you. If, however, you have half a brain in your head, you should be just fine.
If you have half a brain in your ass, you are a mutant, and may have laser eyes.
If you only have half a brain, you are my dog. And I am sorry.
Logic: I'm sorry. The section you have tried to reach exists only in your head. Please hang up and never try again.
Fun: Play this game. I love the band, but the game is trash. If the sound effects don't kill you in ten seconds, I will.   I mean it, bitch.

Puuba.com would like to state that it is always willing to be your dream.
	Sweet thang.

By Danny